For too long, too many of us have believed that Unconditional Love is something that only exceptional people are capable of – the saints and gurus and mystics and messiahs of this world.
And so, most of us have given up on aspiring to love unconditionally. Oh, sure, we make a stab at it every now and again. We even beat ourselves up for failing to love unconditionally. Yet all the time, there is a voice in our heads that keeps telling us that unconditional love is really impossible.
Well, didn’t they say that about flying? And about landing on the moon? And about long distance, real-time communication?
What’s so different about unconditional love, then? Really?
Is it the fact that we seem to ‘fail’ so often? Well, how many times did each of the engineers and architects and scientists who invented all those other things that have become so commonplace, so taken-for-granted we cannot imagine life without them, ‘fail’ before they ‘succeeded’?
Why do we have this built-in assumption that things like ‘unconditional love’ or having certain talents can and must only happen ‘naturally’ and it therefore can and does only happen for certain ‘special’ people and that we’re not them?
Actually, never mind ‘Why?’ Let’s think about the validity of this assumption – It’s not valid. Not one bit.
We are, without exception, created out of LOVE – the natural energy of the universe. And the words LOVE and UNCONDITIONAL are really self-reflexive. The one means the other.
But wait. We’re talking about ‘Unconditional Love’. What exactly is it? Is it a feeling? A state of being? A commitment? A way of life? An idea or ideal?
Does it mean that I must give up my life for someone or something? Does it mean I must give up my current lifestyle? Does it mean that I will become less passionate, less enthusiastic, less committed to certain people and certain things or causes? How will ‘Unconditional Love’ play out in my life?
The short answer is that ‘Unconditional Love’ is not conditional upon time, space or circumstances. Rather, it is responsive or RESPONSE-ABLE (responsible) in every moment so that as we remain present, we are in fact, being unconditionally loving. We are in fact, unconditional love. And our thinking, speaking and behavior is guided by the pure energy and the infinite intelligence of life.
To try and predict precisely what we will be directed to do is to ignore the significance of being present for the energy of the universe, of love, is only ever creative and freely expressed in the present, which is in fact, the eternal now!
Our attempts to project into the (illusory) future by relying on the (illusory) past is a reflection of our lack of awareness, our lack of presence, our investment in the things that we think we know and are guided by our learned beliefs, ideas, opinions, judgments, fears, attachments, aversions and cravings.
It is only when we are free of all of this that we can become the limitlessness and freedom, the peace and the joy, the power and the possibility, and the creative and infinite intelligence that is UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.
For the moment, this may seem like an ideal – something nice, even wonderful but most likely unattainable. So, this is where we need to correct our thinking.
It is not just nice, it is NECESSARY, for if we truly desire peace and joy, freedom and real power, nothing else offers us these things but the state of UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.
And it only appears ‘unattainable’ when we impose our preconceived ideas of what unconditional love is instead of simply allowing ourselves to experience it and to be it.
So how do we allow ourselves to ‘experience’ it and to ‘be’ it?
By being present.
Yes, it is as simple as that.
Ah, but being ‘present’ is not easy, you say.
Being present is neither easy nor difficult. It just is. In fact, it is how and what you naturally are – just as when you were a baby. Then, you only knew how to be present since your mind wasn’t preoccupied with the past or the future.
So, be present. Don’t prejudge the difficulty or ease of it. Just do it. Then, do it again. And again. And again.
Don’t post-judge yourself either.
Just keep doing it as often as you can, as often as you remember. The more often you do it, the more you are likely to do it, as you would with any other habit.
So, how to be ‘present’?
Start simply. Observe your breath. And as you observe your breath and a thought or feeling comes by, observe the thought or feeling or sensation. Just observe. When you notice a judgment of what you are observing, observe the judgment, good or bad. Just observe.
This is the practice of being present. And this is the way in which we slip into the eternal and endless flow of UNCONDITIONAL LOVE.
And as we regain our familiarity with this state of being, this state of consciousness, this energetic flow of life itself, we will become more and more sensitive and aware of its nudges and prompts, its direction of flow, its movement as thought and feeling and sensation.
This is what we must attend to. This is what we must allow to guide our words and actions rather than some preconceived, learned ideas, assertions and behaviors.
And because its nudges and prompts are unique to you and to each moment, there is no way of predicting what those will be. HOWEVER, you can be certain of this:
Acting on its nudges and prompts will ultimately and always shift you into a better-feeling state of being including feeling more peaceful, more joyous, more confident, less fearful, less anxious, more trusting, more free, more certain without having to know the details nor the outcome.
When you first begin to practice Unconditional Love which involves being present and following the nudges and prompts of its Infinite Intelligence, it is ‘normal’ to feel afraid, uncertain, untrusting. After all, you have been so strongly conditioned to rely on your learned ideas and behaviors.
But as you learn to honor these intuitive prompts, you will feel more and more comfortable and confident about them.
Now, it may seem odd that while this post has been on Unconditional Love, I have not said anything about ‘unconditional love’ for someone. That’s because
UNCONDITIONAL LOVE would have no meaning if we were selective about who should benefit from our expression of it.
In other words, we don’t ‘offer’ unconditional love to anyone. Instead, we become ‘Unconditional Love’ by being present and everyone and everything in the universe is affected by it. Because, you see,
UNCONDITIONAL LOVE is really the uninterrupted, natural flow of Life! It is the energy of the Universe flowing without interruption or resistance whether through thought, word, feeling or action!
Those who are in close physical proximity to you may respond to it/you in a visible and tangible way but you should not assume that this is the only response. All of life responds including the things that don’t appear to respond such as the air, the trees, the animals, the rocks, the water. Why would they not when you and they are inextricably part of the ONE, the WHOLE, the ALL?
The point I’m making here is that there is nothing fanciful about Unconditional Love. Its realization occurs in something as mundane as being present. Yet, its power and possibility to create and to heal (which is really to restore us to our natural state of being) is beyond our imagination and can take shape and form in the most simple and straightforward way as well as in the most elaborate and complex way. After all, UNCONDITIONAL LOVE is infinite in its possibilities!
So, are you willing to yield to Unconditional Love? Are you willing to get present? Are you willing to recognize that it is the only way you will experience the peace, joy, power, abundance and freedom that you so deeply desire?
MENTORING
Let Life express itself intoxicatingly, uniquely, powerfully and limitlessly in, as and through you. Don’t settle, whatever your age. Know your true Self. Follow your Bliss. Live the Life that you know you want to! Contact me here.
MINDFULNESS ONLINE
Join me every week to sit in the presence of your true Self and experience the greatness of Life flowing naturally, effortlessly and powerfully in, as and through you!