Mum
What was it like
When you finally left this world?
Was it thrilling or was it frightening?
Did you give up or give in?
If you did give up, what did you give up?
Was it this burdensome life?
Or was it your resistance to the life beyond, unknown as it is?
And if you gave in, what did you give in to?
The clutches of death?
Or the embrace of the divine?
I have thus far not given it much thought
Those final hours and moments of your time on this earth
I didn’t wish to dwell on them lest I felt too sad,
Too sad that this was one journey you had to make
Alone
That neither I nor anyone else could be there with you
That this final leg had to be a solitary one
When your spirit would dispose of its human shell
And go, I don’t know where
I wonder what those last few moments were like Mum
Did the angels surround you
And assure you of your place in heaven?
Did they take your last breath
And place it on a soft white cushion
And assure you that they would keep it safely for you
In heaven
To be given to whomever you chose
For a new life in this world?
Did they sing your favorite hymns
As they lifted your spirit in joyous celebration
Toward heaven?
And was your spirit so deliriously free
That all our ceremonies here to both
Grieve and celebrate your passing
Were merely recorded for future viewing
Because, after all, in the company of angels
And on your way to meet God
You did not wish to be distracted by
The frivolities of this world?
And did you meet God, Mum,
As you prayed you would?
And what was he like?
Oh, now, I am not teasing.
I ask sincerely for that is what you believed.
Alright, that was one of the things you believed
That God was a person and male
But I know you also accepted
That God could not be just a person and just male
That God is ultimately ALL and EVER PRESENT
And beyond naming and defining
So, tell me Mum
Is heaven now your true home?
Or is my heart?
I love you Mum.
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